" A LOT of people are willing to succeed for God, but not many are willing to fail".
- Sunder Krishnan, Pastor of Rexdale Alliance Church
Who would have thought that one of the most inspiring things that I have heard all year, would be about failure.
But it's true, isn't it ?
If you knew that ministry that you had a heart for would take off, hundreds of people would be saved, funding would be no problem, and everyone at church would be talking about the work you were doing...would you do it ?
My guess is you would jump right in, with little to no hesitation. I know I would.
But what about the failures? What if you plan a bible study, and no one shows ? If you had to spend six months fundraising for a ministry position, instead of the intended three? Or if you tried to share your faith with a friend, who refused to listen ?
Are you willing to risk it all for God, trusting Him with the outcome?
The past eight months have been some of the most fulfilling times in my life. Truly, I feel like God and I are in this together, and I have seen Him do amazing things.
But last Monday, standing in front of a crowd of women from a small village in Guatemala, with 50 pairs of eyes staring at me expectantly, my excitement gradually turned to a feeling of "get me outta here....this is not going as planned !!!"
We had a translator, but the ladies didn't seem to have a clue what I was saying.
The morning progressed. Activities during a Beauty for Ashes retreat involve the women drawing pictures depicting their view of God in order to explore how He wants to bring healing to the most broken places in their lives.
They didn't want to draw.
They sat there in silence as the clock ticked by the minutes so slowly.
At one point, one of my teammates gripped my arm and looked at me with her eyes welling up with tears. "They just don't want to do it! I don't know what to do !!" I grabbed her hand, squeezed it, smiled and assured her it would be alright...I knew it would, though I wasn't sure how.
I kept coming up with different strategies in my head, tried encouraging the women in different ways, but nothing seemed to be working and i just had no idea what our team was up against. I had no idea how we were gonna solve this problem.
Eventually we figured out that many of these women, particularly the older ones, in fact, did not know Spanish ! They spoke the language that was native to their village, and actually had no idea what we were saying. We quickly problem solved that we would try a three way translation: English, to Spanish to Tz'utujil, their first language.
Things got somewhat better, but the term "Lost in Translation" really does hold true, and we left the first of three sessions with these ladies feeling discouraged.
Why hadn't it been as successful as the first retreats that we had put on ?
That afternoon, as we debriefed our retreat, it came down to one thing : prayer.
We wanted fruit, we wanted freedom for these women, but we could not do it alone.
Ultimately we wanted God to pull off what we on our own could not.
He did.
As we met with the women again on Wednesday and Friday, the tone was different. The women began to trust us, and more importantly, to trust each other.
The retreat was a success, but only because God let us stumble. He picked us up and lifted us way higher than we ever expected.
I'm so proud of my team...because they are brave enough to fail for God. They know He is big enough for all of our messes, and all of our weaknesses.
So let's be women and men unafraid to fail for God. Let's dream big, especially when we may fail.
Because after all, that's when He really shows up.
Want to know more about how God came through for the women of San Pedro, Guatemala? Here are just a few of the praise reports for that week...
One woman at the retreat had recently found out that her teenage daughter was pregnant. She had been planning on convincing her to have an abortion, but because of what God showed her about worth through the activities we did with the women, she was going to support her daughter in having the baby.
Another woman shared that she was so impacted by the activities, that she chose to start building into her husband again and believing in their marriage, and as she shared this with him he decided to stop the affair that he was having and also fight for their marriage.
One woman in my small group shared that she loved having the chance to talk to her friends about what God was doing in her life, because although they met regularly, they rarely had an opportunity to talk to one another about The Lord, they only listened to others talk to them.
A home for young women who have been affected by sexual abuse in the form of incest, as well as another community of blind women in Guatemala have expressed an interest in having Beauty for Ashes be brought to their women !
God really is on the move with Beauty for Ashes...so, even if it means that I will have more moments where I feel like I am failing, I am willing to risk it...because it means more of Him.
What about you ....are you willing to fail for the name of Jesus to be lifted high ?
What risks or challenges do you feel like God is challenging you to take? What is holding you back ?